Once the calendar turned to March, people have been out in droves buying fishing gear. This is the month that Bass Pro has their three week long biggest sale of the year. Especially on weekends we are really busy spooling reels for people, cashing them out, and answering questions. Because of the rod and reel trade in, we have sold hundreds of rods and reels in the last two weeks.
Knowing that we were bound to get an uptick in stupid questions I started a log where we wrote down dumb interactions. Over the course of a weekend we filled up the front side of a piece of notebook paper. Unfortunately, one of the assistant managers thought it was not a good idea so we couldn't keep it behind the counter. Too bad because it had stories I'd love to share.
Disclaimer
Before I start, I have to post this disclaimer...I am not making fun of people without experience fishing. One of the best parts of my job is sharing knowledge with people. I've shown many beginners how to string a pole. I've taught kids and adults how to tie a palomar knot. I've spent a lot of time talking with recently retired guys about the cheapest spinning reel under $100. Five times a week I give a lesson to people that are buying their first baitcaster. I explain the drag, brake, and thumb position so often it sounds like a recording.
It is not those people I am writing about. It is the people that think they know what they are talking about but don't. It's the people so full of shit that the whites of their eyes are brown, yet they keep talking to try to make it look as though they know what they are talking about. We have rich people that buy a boat , know nothing about fishing, and ask us to outfit them with all of the rods, reels, and lures that they need. No research, no questions, just more money than brains. It is these people that made our list...
-As I write this, I received a story from my friend Corey at work. He waited on a guy that bought a twelve foot Ugly Stick (extremely heavy and very strong) so he could catch small snappers in Florida. Corey tried to explain that you do not need this rod for two pound fish. The guy was not deterred because he "watched a video". So the guy took down the huge rod and knocked over several jigging rods in the next aisle. When Corey went to ring him out he explained there was a question to round up for conservation on the touch screen. Instead of hitting "no thanks" the guy just said no. Then because of our sale, the reel was cheaper than the guy expected and argued with Corey about why it was cheaper.
-One that I remember vividly because it was the first one I wrote down on the notebook paper was a guy came in looking to buy a heavier rod because (direct quote) " like all guys I tend to use lures that are too heavy and ten or fifteen cast later the line snaps and they end up in the trees". Like all guys was my favorite part of that quote
-We have people all of the time trying to match rods and reels that don't match in size. I may have wrote about if t before but my buddy Adam had to spool a large 5000 size reel that was attached to a six foot ultra light rod. The rod was going to be for squiding
-One thing that actually annoys me is when a customer gets a large reel that can easily hold over 300 yards of braid and they want me to spool it with 150 yards. We use either tape or backing below the braid anyway, but I had someone give me a conventional reel that I had to spool about eighty percent of it with backing and the rest with one hundred and fifty yards of braid. I get it that braid is expensive and you are trying to save fifteen bucks but don't ask me to spool your reel if you don't want me to do it right.
-Corey seems to be a magnet for stupid questions. There are a lot of stuffed animals (taxidermy of once living animals) and fish in the store. Someone asked him how they got the grizzly to pose like that before they shot it. The worst part... he has been asked that question twice.
- A woman asked him where the worms are. When Corey said they were in the refrigerator the woman said "so like I have to touch them".
Poor Corey has been asked where the fishing rods are at. Trust me folks, you can't miss them if you are in the fishing section. There are rods above every aisle.
- Not a stupid question but one thing I despise is when men ask me where the gloves are because they don't want to touch a fish. Seriously? You are going to go fishing and you don't want slime on your hands. Wuss. If I can sneak it into the conversation, like if they ask me what gloves I use or recommend I tell them I don't use gloves and after my son had coordination to not stick himself with a hook, I made him take his own fish off the hook without gloves. If you need to wear a fishing glove or use a rag because you don't want to touch a fish then the sport isn't for you. Also don't teach your kid that touching fish is gross.
- My buddy Tony was asked if we had any left handed Van Staal reels while the customer was reeling the left handed Van Staal upside down. An example of more money than brains.
- A customer came up to Tony and I with a spool of braid where the top of it had been opened ( probably by someone that wanted to see how thick it was. It happens all the time). We have two aisles of braided line. He told us all of our braid was used. This would be a place I would insert a palm to my face emoji.
- Someone asked Tony where the remote control boats are that drop the bait.
I have only hung out with one co-worker outside of work. Adam. We've gotten food and gone shooting. As I've wrote before, Adam know gear. He knows more of the specs on rods and reels than the rest of us. He is also outspoken about it and can be rude. If he knows he is right about a spec or how a reel works, he won't back down. Sometimes we just watch as he says things the rest of us would never say.
For example... we don't sell mystery tackle boxes. Yet we get the question all of the time mostly from kids. When Adam tells them that we don't have them in store he also says " the mystery is it is all of the crap that doesn't sell".
There is this baitcasting reel that has a computer chip in it made by Shimano. The chip is a DC or digital chip. It is in a couple of models including Curado and SLX. The models that have the chip are between $80-100 more than the regular Curado or SLX. The chip is there to make the reel brake so you don't get backlashes. It also make a sound that all the kids are into. It is all over Tik Tok. Those of us that know how to throw a baitcaster think the DC is stupid. If you want to own a baitcaster you should actually learn to use one instead of having a computer do it for you. Yes you will get backlashes and have to cut your line. Eventually you will learn to use one. So when people come in wanting a DC we all kind of roll our eyes when the customer isn't looking. The size 300 Curado is made for casting big heavy swimbaits. You can buy the 300 model with the DC. When anyone asks Adam to look at the 300 DC Adam not so politely tells them " if you buy a 300DC you don't deserve a swimbait reel".
James had a lady tell him "my son mostly catches ten pound bass. Do you think this line is strong enough?" Sure lady, sure.
Another person wanted him to put thirty pound Dacron on a baitcaster.
Lastly, it happens all of the time when a person is looking for help they will ask us " do you know anything about fishing?" or before they ask their question they will say "do you fish?"
I had thought the last paragraph would be the end of the post, but last night I had another winner. A guy came in with two inshore rods. One was a medium and the other a medium heavy. Both rods were extremely light. Despite saying it was a medium inshore rod it really felt like a medium freshwater rod (the lure rating was 1/4-5/8 oz). He bought not one but two Shimano Stradics. He bought a 4000 and a 5000. Stradics are my favorite reel in the store, but it was clear this guy had more money than fishing knowledge. He had us put the handle of both reels on the side he reels with. I spooled the reels for him. He had thirty pound braid on one and forty on the other. When I was done, he asked me to set both combos up for him (this annoys me when grown ass men ask me to string their pole). So I had to put the two reels on the pole. Then I strung the line through the guides. THEN I had to attach a snap swivel to his line. He didn't have mono or fluoro leader. I tied the snap directly to the braid as he requested. So it wasn't exactly a shock that he said he really hasn't caught anything big. The biggest fish he has caught in saltwater (mind you, he has a boat) is a big blue he caught during a blitz. You don't say!
Thanks to the guys I work with. I had forgotten many of these stories. So I sent texts out to Corey, Adam, James, and Tony. Within seconds they were answering the call.
