Things I am thankful for

We interrupt our regularly scheduled posts about Florida to bring you a post about things I am thankful for.  Regularly scheduled posts about Florida will resume tomorrow.

   Every year I do a post where I write what I am thankful for in the outdoors. I do a list of between ten and twenty things I am thankful for. Some of the things are on the list every year such as New Hampshire, Stripers, Dave and Laurie.  However, this year because of rescheduling things that were planned from last year and because I needed breaks from my stressful job, I did a lot of fun things. To list them off as things I am "thankful for" would just be self serving. So I am not going to do that, besides, I do an end of the year review anyway, so I'll write them there. 

  During the last two weeks I have dealt with death and life. Because of this, my post about being thankful has a different perspective from other years. Since I was vaccinated in May, I have been living as though the pandemic is over. I trust the science. I trust that if I were to catch Covid, the vaccination will keep me out of the hospital. I do not fear being out in the public, working, and obviously I don't fear travel. This feeling is not being cocky or arrogant. Like I said, I trust the science.

   However, Covid is very much real. Over the last two weeks, I lost my cousin, Mark. I was closer to him than any other relative. After a long fight he passed away last week. He lived in Maine and I visited him there a couple of times. We took a week long vacation to Florida a few years back. I will miss him.

   On rhis trip to  Florida I almost drowned. It's a long story, but I went snorkeling without my fins on and I almost didn't make it back to the beach. I can not exaggerate enough that I thought I was going to die. I have not been as scared as I was in my life. I really thought it was the end. 

   So as you can imagine, losing a close cousin and almost losing my life has gotten me thinking. As my second cousin's and Mark's brother have their first Thanksgiving only days after he passed, I write this thankful to be alive and sad I will never see him again. 

   Since I almost drowned I have had almost nightly vivid dreams that I was about to die (different ways, not just drowning). These are just dreams and when I wake from them I am back asleep in ten minutes. But I am very thankful to be alive. But it is more than that, I am thankful to be living. What is the point of life if you don't enjoy it? I enjoy it. My bad day happened on my fourth day in Florida. I still had eight more glorious days to enjoy. And I did. We did and saw a lot of cool things. I went snorkeling again just to make sure I wouldn't develop an uncontrollable fear of it. I spent about an hour snorkeling a couple of days later. 

   So this year, instead of being thankful for stripers, New Hampshire, or a quick trip to Philly, I am thankful for being thankful. I am very glad that sunsets don't seem prettier or that the mountain views don't seem more special. Because to me I have appreciated them always. I love my friends and I love the memories I have made this year. I planned as many trips as I could into this year and even when they didn't go as planned I still appreciated getting away. As I was reminded over the last two weeks, life is short. I'm glad I am still here to enjoy it. Though I will miss Mark, I have great memories from the trip to Florida.  For all the reasons above,  I am thankful.

"I'm not here for a long time, I'm here for a good time"

-various artists and Mark Vieira